I’ve been struggling with intense insomnia for last couple years or so but more severely, and every single night, since January. It’s frustrating but especially for a doer like me because my disability already infringed on my productivity and all the personal projects and dreams I want to do and accomplish. Complete lack of sleep further exacerbates this quest. As I lay here struggling with all the residual affects of this disease, pain, lack of sleep and other health issues/worries, I can’t help but think about healthy people who are focusing on when the mall will open and how they don’t realize how lucky and privileged they are to have good health...When you have health issues your entire world is dominated by it. This whole thing is just a neverending story, a marathon...and all I can think of is this is only going to get worse for today I am physically my best...(not looking for pity).
II’m working on a piece for Love What Matters. A couple weeks ago the editor found me and asked me to write a piece for them. With 8 million followers it’s potentially a decent sized audience, and I’m thinking of ways to tell my story differently, but it’s hard since I’ve told it over and over again — almost to the point that I feel most must be bored of it now.
This week I’ll be sharing an article I wrote for a magazine on my experience with job discrimination. It’s a story I haven’t shared for years because of how difficult it was when it was happening. I internalized this experience as it greatly affected my confidence and self-worth, but it’s an important subject and I’m eager for others to finally read it.
As someone who never considered themselves a writer, I’ve done so much writing, publicly and privately, and hope one day all this sharing and work will be made useful towards the development of a book, though I find it strange that anyone would want to read what I have to say because as someone living it, my life doesn’t seem particularly interesting. But perhaps someone out there is looking to find their hidden voice inside mine...and that’s reason enough to share. ✏️
My art gallery
Follow my wheelchair travels, art and musings at Instagram.com/kamredlawsk